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A sweatshirt; a measly, stinking, good for nothing, 100% cotton sweatshirt: This small, seemingly insignificant, in the grand scheme of things, item left me almost crippled.

Mandifesto had been waiting in the BlizzCon shwag line for a good two hours before she had to leave to do an interview. I kindly took her spot in this line of Satan, thinking "It's only for a few minutes, she should be back soon." I was so innocent and naïve back then...

I have to give the BlizzCon line creators props; they have some kind of voodoo magic that makes their lines not seem so daunting until you have been in them for many hours; but by that time you have been in line so damn long there is no way you are leaving. This line snaked and twisted, had secret corridors and I am sure a few portals. I heard on many occasions: "This is like the lines at Disneyland, but with no ride at the end." Regretfully, the lines at Disneyland soon palled in comparison to this epic, no... legendary Blizzard line.

Eventually Mandi did return triumphantly from her interview. I greeted her warmly from my position in line: three feet ahead of where she left me. After a ridiculously long while, Mandifesto had better things to do than stand in a roped off circus act; so I was left to survive the horror alone. I became so bored that I began texting random friends. "What are you doing?" They would ask. "Standing in line." I replied over and over and over. After 3 hours of this, my friends began to wonder what the hell was going on. They began to question my sanity, and after hour four, so did I. But this was my vendetta.

Anyone who knows me knows how stubborn I am - stubborn to an obvious fault. Any sane person would begin to question their actions after five hours, I began to question many things: Life, quantum physics, the odd smells from the people around me, but I never once considered leaving that god forsaken line. Trust me, there was peer pressure; many of my friends, meaning only the best for me, begged me to leave, to get some air; but I stood on!

After five hours and 30 horrible, torturous and painstaking minutes, I finally neared the end of the line. By now the cash registers looked like life rafts after being on a deserted island for 15 years - water after traveling in a hot desert for days. I am not exaggerating. The feelings that rushed over me as I neared the end of the line surprised even me. I became giddy and giggly. It helped that the cashiers wielded blue light-up pens. The waved me in like beacons of hope. As with most things in this world, the closer I got, the longer the line seemed to take. Sure, I spent nearly six hours in line, but I spent a millennium two feet away from the registers.

When that glowing blue pen of awesome finally waved for me, it took all I had not to skip over there shouting and hooting like a crazed Packers fan. When at last I spoke the words I had been dreaming of speaking: "One BlizzCon hoodie please." I was greeted with a long pause and a "Is that all?!" I blushed as I admitted to the woman that, yes, I had waiting in this awful hell for six hours for one sweatshirt. (I have to give a shout out to the random woman standing next to me at the register. She let me know that the hoodies run about two sizes too small. If it were not for her, I would have to have waited in that line again.)

At last I had my hoodie; and due to the terror I put myself through to get it, I will probably wear the damn thing every single day this winter. Hell, I might even sport it in the summer. Why stop there?! Maybe I should wear 'er until I buy a new one next BlizzCon.

A word to the wise: Beware. The BlizzCon ticket line is Hell on earth. That experience is as close to masochism as I will ever get. Get there early, run if you must.

Also, I just have to add, that the next day, Mandifesto used her press pass to get in five minutes early, and waited in line a whole of three minutes before getting her items. So, yes, I am fully and painfully aware of how freakin' pointless that whole adventure was.

I will know better next year... maybe.

Happy Gaming,

CnC

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